Do you remember how I told you all about how great I was feeling, and how I was gaining more confidence in being able to push myself a little harder? Do you remember how happy I sounded to be actively working out again?
Forget about all that!
It was premature jubilation!
Wednesday about 1pm I crashed. And I crashed hard! It was like all this progress I was feeling, and stamina I was gaining just came tumbling down around me. I hit a wall face first. I was so exhausted at work Wednesday afternoon that I could barely function. I went and got a pedicure after work with every intention of doing my cardio dance DVD when I got home (I can do that barefoot). I had to go to the grocery store before heading home, but my plan when I woke up Wednesday morning was to go to work, get a pedicure, do my grocery shopping, and then do my workout later in the evening while Mark was at his game.
Got my work day done.
Got my pedicure done.
Got my shopping done.
Got home and crashed. I was in bed by 9pm. I didn’t go to sleep but I was curled up in my blanket catching up on my Ellen shows for the week. I was exhausted. I couldn’t move. My body completely failed me. But it wasn’t just my body. It was my mind that was numb as well. It’s a sad day when mind and body go down at the same time. Normally one can encourage the other, but not this time. Just stick a fork in me because I was done.
Mark got home from volleyball to find me in bed and he looked concerned. I never go to bed that early. He asked if I was OK. I told him I was just so tired. He goes, “You’ve been hitting it pretty hard. Do you think that’s smart?” I couldn’t respond because I was fighting back the tears that were stinging my eyes. He said, “What happened to the plan of just walking until you were at least 12 weeks post-op?” I said, “But it felt soooooo good to work out.” He rolled his eyes at me. He knows how I am. I don’t do much of anything half way.
So now I have to get back on track. I need to stick to the “just walking” thing until my body has had more of a chance to heal. I need to remember that I had some pretty major surgery and that I’m not going to just bounce back overnight. I can’t count the number of people that have said, “You just need to be patient.” Yup…because THAT is one of my strong suits.
I’m back on track now. Back to just walking. Because I can’t take another wall tumbling down on me.