Six Years And Counting

FB memories are a funny thing. I began a journey into the unknown EIGHT years ago, and what was supposed to be a quick four to six week healing process knocked me on my ass for a full two years due to complications. Six years ago I was released by the doctor from my final surgery to begin doing….whatever I wanted to do. I am reminded of my lease back into life every year because FB tells me about it.

The memory today stung a little more than it has in the past six years because last night I missed my THIRD volleyball game because of this stupid ankle injury. Technically, I’m two weeks post-injury, but my ankle rolled less than 5 minutes into my game, so I’ve missed THREE games.

I’m really trying to keep things in perspective, but sometimes my brain doesn’t allow me the logic that brains should allow. Between the injury and the good ol’ Missouri spring-time weather, I’ve been cooped up inside for what feels like an eternity. For the last two days I’ve been 100% in Poor Poor Pitiful Me mode, and I’m sure my husband is about ready to smother me with a pillow while I sleep.

And then that damned memory popped up. I looked at the date, did the math, and thought “Holy hell, I can’t believe I even survived that shit with my sanity intact.” A small glimmer of reality began to settle in and remind me that I’ve been through MUCH worse than a sprained ankle, and I lived to tell about it. And I went through that hellish process with my sense of humor intact (most days). I’m not 100% laid up like I was back then. I can still go for walks (if the damned rain would stop). I can still DO things, not like back then. Perspective is an interesting thing.

I’m not saying that I’m going to go through the rest of the healing process without whining and complaining about it. I mean, who do you think I am….Mother Theresa? Oh, no. I will whine about my damned ankle! Pretty sure I’m going to whine and complain that I have a race in a week and a half and I’m not going to PR like I’ve been planning on doing since I had to drop down from my half marathon. AND, I’m definitely going to have freak outs here and there because OHMYGODIHAVETOSTARTHALFMARATHONTRAININGINTWOMONTHSANDWHATIFI’MNOTHEALEDBYTHEN!?!?!?!?!?! I’m fairly certain I’m going to have plenty those days.

What I am saying is that my FB memories gave me a little much needed perspective this morning. In the grand scheme of things, this injury is nothing more than an irritation that has set me back a little bit. But it’s nothing I can’t come back from.

So…patience, right? Yeh, nope. That’s not my style. Reality is my style. And I got a big dose of it this morning. Thanks, FB Memories.


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