CHARGE!!!

You know what I hate? When something goes weird with your car and you try to explain to your husband what it’s doing.

Last weekend I was at my folks and noticed on Saturday that my car was suddenly being a little sluggish when I first started to accelerate. If I was at a dead stop and I’d press on the gas to go, it would chug then go. Once it was going it was fine. No problemo. Just that initial start-off point. So I called Mark before I headed home from the city just to let him know that I was having issues.

He set up an appointment with our car guy to get it looked at. Mark called me to get an exact description of what was happening and then informed me that he hadn’t noticed it doing that. I told him, “That’s because you don’t baby my car like I do. You start off by putting the gas pedal directly to the floor boards.” He chuckled and said, “Well, that’s your problem. You just need to get on it, Baby!” Hah! “Gettin’ on it” really fucks with the miles per gallon. He continued to give me crap on babying my car as he drove home from the car-guy’s place. He goes, “Man, it would be way too easy to get a speeding ticket in this thing.” DUDE, there’s a reason I don’t let you drive my car!!

He promised that when he got back to work he’d google some of the tech forums to see if he could come up with a fix for it.

After he’d been back for bit he called me to read me something from the internet, and was having a very difficult time masking his glee:

Here is how to reduce electronic throttle lag:

With no money invested-
1.Battery disconnect. 30-60 minutes is good, if you have the time.
2.Reconnect the battery, fire it up and drive it like an absolute maniac. Give it all the WOT you possibly can, as long as you possibly can.
(A dragstrip is probably best for obvious safety reasons)

Not only will the throttle response improve, but the trans shift quality will improve. This is due to the adaptive memory in modern vehicle pcms; If you drive it very easy for very long, the vehicle will learn your driving habits….the throttle will act slow and the trans will shift like oatmeal. If you drive like a maniac long enough, throttle response ‘wakes up’, the trans shifts harder, and it will feel better to a performance driver.

But, the effect is temporary. Drive it really slow and easy for 3 trips of 50 miles or more, adaptive memory will take over and it will go back to the way it was.

BASTARD!

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