I Am A Coffee Pusher

IMG_5611This morning I was getting ready to walk out the door and, per my normal routine, grabbed my travel mug and headed to the coffee pot to pour my morning cup. And there was no coffee! How is that even possible? Apparently, I didn’t get the pot set up last night to start brewing this morning so I started my day with no coffee.  That reminded me of this post. It’s one of the first that I wrote when I started keeping a blog three years ago. I thought it would be fitting to post it again.

Mmmm. Coffee.

Originally posted on February 3, 2010: I haven’t always been a coffee pusher. As a matter of fact, once I became a coffee pusher I didn’t even KNOW that I was a coffee pusher.

I know that I’ve always liked coffee. When I was a kid, the dime store (yes, it was a dime store back then, not a dollar store) carried assorted hard candy packages. There were all sorts of flavors (hence “assorted”), one of them being coffee. That was my favorite. I would pick out the coffee flavored hard candies and horde them. One day my dad asked what I was eating. “Candy” was my response because even as a kid, I knew that coffee was forbidden. “What kind of candy?” Silence. Why is it that kids don’t figure out sooner that “silence” is parent-speak for “guilt?” So my dad took my hard candies. Let’s just say that he was displeased with my choice. “You shouldn’t eat these. You will acquire a taste for coffee.” Did I mention that coffee was forbidden? It was the evil drink. It ranked right up there with alcohol (gasp!). We’ll save that topic for a different day. (Interjection: how do you have to acquire a taste for something that you like the very first time you try it? Anyway…)

Being the good, obedient daughter, I didn’t sneak anymore coffee treats. Then I moved away from home! (You’re thinking I went off the deep end! Wrong!) I was still the good, obedient daughter even though my dad wasn’t around to check up on me. Then I got married and was STILL the good obedient daughter, only now add “wife” to that, and I stayed away from my coffee candies. Then life bitch slapped me a couple of times and I came to find out that being the good, obedient daughter/wife was NOT a happy place!!! I wanted my coffee candies, damn it!

Mocha Latte! Caramel Macchiato!! Espresso! Plain old java with a single Splenda! It doesn’t matter. I wanted it!!!

Does this make me a coffee pusher?

I have the most fabulous girls at work. I love my work girlfriends. Our personalities are as different as can be, but we have a common bond. Coffee! We love our coffee. The first one to work each morning gets the coffee pot fired up. The first one finished with her first cup gets round two going. That should be enough for one day, right? To my work girlfriends, it is. But there is something about a fresh cup of coffee in the afternoon that just warms my cockles! So by 2 I can’t take it anymore and make that notorious third pot of coffee. Do I drink it all by myself? I most certainly do not! I am joined by my work girlfriends. I am joined by my boss. I am joined by my non- “work girlfriend” colleagues. Is it MY fault that they join me in a cup of afternoon joe? It is not. Do I shovel the coffee down their gullets? I do not. Do I threaten them with bodily harm if they do not drink it? I do not! Do I tempt them with the heavenly aroma of freshly brewed coffee wafting down the hallways? I do not! I do? I, I, I…Uh… DAMN IT!!

I am a coffee pusher.

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2 thoughts on “I Am A Coffee Pusher

  1. >OK, grammar nazi!Cockles: "any bivalve mollusk of the genus Cardium, having somewhat of a heart shaped, radially ribbed valve!"Get your damn mind out of the gutter. Cockles has always been an expression used to describe the heart! Thank you very much.You're right about the life/bitch thing!

  2. >Bwahahaha. Two things. One, Life Bitch should be capitalized, since it's, you know, a proper noun. Two, do you have cockles? I thought only boys had cockles. Or maybe….well.Nevermind.

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