The Rest Of The Story

Last night I was on the internet chatting with one of my pals. Mark was off playing volleyball. Fairly typical Sunday night. At least it started off that way.

I was happily chatting away when there was a sudden crash that came from the shop in the basement. Here. Why don’t I save some time and just show you that particular piece of the conversation:

me: … Something downstairs just fell. I need to go check it out because I think it’s in the shop where Jake is eating. BRB.
Her: What was it?
 me: Hmm. I have a hanging light above my workbench in the shop and it somehow fell. That must have scared Jake shitless. He’s a little skittish of loud noises. Mark will have to hang it when he gets home.
 Her: What’s Mark doing tonight?
me: Mark goes to the Y on Sundays and plays pick up games of volleyballs I’m home by myself and I don’t get nervous, but sometimes when there are weird noises in the house I immediately jump to “omg, someone is trying to get in and kill me.” I’m thinking that’s normal, right? 🙂 
Her: Yes, that is very normal. I’m awful in the middle of the night if I hear something. I basically stop breathing to see if I hear another noise…
me: I’m normally not too bad. My house is old and creaks a lot, so the noises one hears in the night don’t freak me out. But something like a light crashing to the ground is too loud to brush off as “creaky old house.”
When Mark got home from volleyball I told him the light had fallen. Minor cursing occurred as he went down the hall to head towards the basement. When he came back upstairs I knew that it wasn’t good. There was a leak underneath the kitchen sink and it had soaked the ceiling downstairs enough to loosen the connectors holding the shop light up. Back under the sink Mark went. A place that he spent far too long Saturday AND Sunday playing around in.
I went to help him. You know. The most important help in the world. I held the flashlight. He tightened and tightened and tightened the nuts but there was still a continual little trickle of water coming down. The mumbling curses about the shitty way everything in this house was put together carried on as he struggled to get the water to stop dripping. He finally looked at me and said, I’m going to have to just replace the whole…..[fill in the blank because I’ve no clue what all that plumbing shit under the sink is called].”
We wrapped a towel around the dripping pipe and went to bed. After lying there for a few minutes he got out of bed and left the room. He was back a few minutes later, informed me that when I went down to let the dogs out in the morning be sure to turn the water back on. So he just shut the water off to the whole house over night.
In the morning I turned the water back on so we could get ready for work. I have no idea when Mark left work to come back home to take care of it but when I got home from work tonight I had a working sink and no leaks.
No place in the house is there an individual shut off valve for hot/cold water. Everything has to be shut off from the main line downstairs. He headed to Lowes and told one of the worker bees that he wanted to add a shutoff valve under the kitchen sink. The guy led him right to the area, showed him what he needed, asked if he had any questions, and sent Mark on his way. It took Mark an hour. One hour! After spending the better part of two days fucking with the stupid plumbing.
So…I have water again. And in the words of the late Paul Harvey…now you know the rest of the story!

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