Oh, Good Gawd, I’m An Idiot

I suppose that’s not entirely true. I’m actually a fucking idiot! You’re not going to believe the stunt I pulled today.

I’ve set a goal to spend an hour in my yard after work each day before I do my workout. Yesterday and today that time has been spent in my veggie garden. Yesterday weeding, today weeding my big bed and getting the weed barrier laid so that I can get a load of gravel and finish it up. I’m the smart one, so yesterday I checked inside my shed to make sure that I still had weed barrier. There was the big roll, so I didn’t bother stopping by the store on my way home.


Weed barrier. Only not. I pulled the roll out and down by the chain link fence I started unrolling it. My brain is telling me there is something entirely wrong with this picture but I can’t quite put my foot on it until, well…until I put my foot on it.

You see, when I put my foot on it, the surface was tacky. I mean, obviously it looks tacky at the moment because there are no rocks covering it, but it felt tacky. I stood there for a good long time staring at it trying to figure out what my brain was screaming at me to understand.

It is not weed barrier, you fucking idiot!!!!

That’s what my brain was screaming at me. No, indeed. It is not weed barrier. It is roofing paper that I used when I put the shingles on my dog house last fall. You know….tar paper!! I feel an Uncle Remus story comin on!

::walks away, head hung in shame::

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