Health and Fitness

If It Isn’t Rough It Isn’t Fun

Minds out of the gutter, Bitchez! I’m talking about working out. Sheesh!

Holy shit, was it ever difficult to convince myself that I needed to go down and get on the treadmill for a while. But I did it! And it was actually fun!!  Who knew? I did circuits. If you’re getting bored with the same old routine you should try this. I read about it in my Prevention magazine and kind of changed up the different exercises to suit me.

Step 1. Warm up for ten minutes. You don’t have to use a treadmill. You can do this anywhere that you’re going to walk. However, when I’m doing circuits I like to do them in the privacy of my own home because I’m self concious of doing lunges along the walking trail.  So…I did a ten minute warm up. Five minutes at 2 mph and five minutes at 3 mph.

Step 2. Thirty seconds at 3.5 mph. Get your arms swing pretty good to get your heart rate up.

Step 3. Thirty seconds of stair steps. I hold three pound weights in each hand and as I step up I raise both arms so that my elbows are bent and parallel to my shoulders and hands are facing the ceiling. At the same time I lift my right leg (the non-stepping leg) backwards. Then I alternate and step with my right leg and left with my left leg. My watch has a backwards timer so I just set it at 30 seconds so that I don’t have to watch a clock. That’s too distracting. If you’re walking outside, you can use a curb for this. At home, I use the base of my Bowflex. It’s not as tall as a normal step would be, but it works.

Step 4. Repeat step 2.

Step 5. With the three pound weights in each hand, lunges. Alternate between legs.

Step 6. Repeat step 2.

Step 7. Jumping jacks. My first round I had planned on doing mountain climbers, but I forgot that I have those stupid carpet squares in my basement and I was kicking them all over the place. So I switched up on my second round and did jumping jacks. Well, except that I had on the wrong sports bra so I kind of did a little running in place thing while raising my arms in jumping jack position. God forbid I knock myself out by wearing the wrong bra. Ouch. Oh…but then I didn’t think that would get my heart rate up so the third round I did the pseudo jumping jacks while holding three pound weights in each hand. It’s all about the light weights.

Step 8. Repeat step 2.

Step 9. Ten pound kettle bell, baby!!  Sit on the floor with your knees bent and feet on the floor (or slightly off the ground if your abs are in better shape than mine). Hold the kettle bell and for thirty seconds lift it across your stomach and touch the floor alternately on each side of your mid section. This would be a difficult circuit to do if you’re out walking on a path instead of in your basement. Leave it out, if that’s the case, and go from step 7 to step 10.

Step 10. Five minutes on the treadmill at 3.5 mph.

Repeat steps 1 – 10 three times.

Step 11. Three minutes on the treadmill at 4 mph. Get your arms swinging. I mean, really swinging. Elbows level with your shoulders, fists towards the celings. Pump your arms in rhythm with your stride. By this time you will be flinging sweat all over the room. Holy shit, I was sweating like a pig. Well, that’s not an accurate statement since pigs don’t sweat. I was sweating like a HORSE!!!

Step 12. Cool down. Two minutes at 3 mph and five minutes at 2 mph. You’ll feel like you are freaking crawling at 2 mph.

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!  Feels so good! With the transition time, the whole workout will take between 45 and 50 minutes (depending on whether or not you do the kettle ball step). To stretch out when I was finished I just did a Half Sun Salutation (google it if you don’t know what that is, I’ve rambled long enough).

Side note: Cobra pose is difficult to do when 140 pound dog decides to lean on your shoulders.

4 thoughts on “If It Isn’t Rough It Isn’t Fun”

  1. Just read your comment about pizza dough on the Dooce Community page–would like to chat by email when you have a minute. I’m in the St. Louis area too. I need help with pizza dough!!!

  2. I am so proud of you. Granted, I didnt know you before, but it seems like you are bouncing back and doing really well 🙂 You “sound” a lot happier too

    1. I feel a lot better and it’s much easier to be ‘up’ when you feel good. I’m not bouncing back nearly as fast as I’d like and I have to keep telling myself to be realistic. 🙂

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