Random Thoughts

Own Your Words

At work on Friday Ann sent me a note that said something to the effect that in her stat counter there was an IP address that was going through post after post after post of hers. The address was located in a town where a couple of my siblings live. My first thought was to cringe a litte because I know that Ann lives a different lifestyle than my family does. As we were chatting she mentioned that this address linked to her blog from my blog. Well, shut my mouth! My second thought was to cringe a little because I know that I live a different lifestyle than my family does.

I write like I talk and I have a bit of a potty mouth. My family knows this about me. I am very good to tone down my language when the young nieces and nephews are around so my family really doesn’t hear the extent of my potty mouth and may perhaps be a bit shocked. My family also knows that I have some issues with the church, although they may not know the extent of those feelings and may perhaps be a bit shocked. My family knows that I have had some lady-bits issues but they don’t know the nitty gritty, down and dirty details and may perhaps be a bit shocked. Or grossed out. I mean, really, who wants to hear about your big sister’s uterus falling out, or bladder being punctured, or butthole sagging? No one! Guaranteed.

I know that one of my brothers already reads my blog. He texted me and told me he was reading so I gave him the heads up that if it was tagged “POP (Pelvic Organ Prolapse)” that he should probably skip past it for the sake of his brotherly sanity. He didn’t take that advice and began reading a post, but stopped abruptly when he read “uterus” in the post. Poor guy. He may never be the same.

From the time I started writing, I knew that there would come a day when the family might find this place. I thought long and hard about that aspect before I even began. Would it dictate what I write about? Would it dictate how I write about what I write about? I decided the answer had to be no. I am who I am. I am happy with who I am. I love my life. I love where I am in my life. It’s not the place my family would choose for me and that’s alright. I’m very much at peace with the choices I’ve made.

You know, it’s funny, but we are all grown up. We’re all adults living our lives. Choosing our own paths. Believing our own beliefs. But when we all get together we kind of fall back into our childhood roles when we were all living together as kids. I think that we have a hard time remembering that we are not those people anymore. We are an evolved version of that person that we used to be while living under the safety of our parents’ roof We have all learned our own lessons from our own life experiences and it has shaped us into the adults that we have become. And in my opinion, we have all grown into some pretty fabulous adults.

So I will continue to write the way I write and I won’t make apologies for it. Don’t get me wrong, I won’t be posting a link to my blog on my Facebook. That’s just crazy! But I will be my own person. And I will own my words.


2 thoughts on “Own Your Words”

  1. Good for you. I still censor what I put on my blog, just because I have a few very close friends who are LDS and it may very well make them have heart attacks to read some of the stuff. I wish I knew that they would still love me, and I am sure they would, BUT they would think of me differently. And I’m not sure I am ready for that 😐

    1. I get where you’re coming from, Shawna. A true friend will love you no matter what. I’m lucky in that my family stands by me no matter what. I know there is a lot disappointment in my decision to leave the church and I know it wasn’t easy for them, but I know they love me anyway. Of course, they’re family. They’re stuck with me. LOL.

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